Let the first time mom be

Since becoming a mom this year I have been given advice from just about everyone. I have learned so much from the wonderful mothers around me. Most of the comments and advice I've received has been so kind and well meant. Sometimes not so much...
Some comments/conversations end up going something like: 

• "Don't hold him too much, you'll spoil him and he'll get use to it."
• Sometimes they give me that look... you know? The one that says "oooh you're a first time mom."
•  My favorite is when they ask, "is this your first?" 
• Other times they just come out and say, "You'll calm down with your next one" or "I use to be like that too". 

Then I have a line from Madagascar come to mind: "Smile and wave boys, just smile and wave."

You see, mix studying the health sciences for the last 5 years, working in a doctors office, and a first time mom and you get a borderline hypochondriac who thinks the worst possible scenario after three consecutive sneezes  or coughs from her precious little man. I love the several people who have told me, "getting around lots of people will build his immune system."

Uh hum, no it wont. Whooping cough will kill him. RSV, Influenza, and pneumonia could too.

Besides from us first times mom's being paranoid about every little thing that could go wrong I think there is a beautiful side to this amateur mother business.  I love holding him. I love walking around with him at bed time rocking him to sleep. I love singing to him. I love seeing his dad hold him and cuddle time. I love when we just sit together and enjoy watching his every move. I love it all. I had never been a mom. There is something so magical about being a mom. There is something so sweet about having this little baby in our home.
 
A good friend of mine once said to me, "Loving a baby isn't spoiling them. Spoiling is when you set them on the shelf and forget about them"

To all the well wishers, next time you get a chance to talk to a first time mom. Remember, yes there will be MANY things she will swear to herself that she will do different next time. But remember that this is a special and sacred time also. You don't know how long that mommy will have her sweet baby. Children don't last forever. Every day could be that mother's last. Let her cuddle her precious babe. Have confidence in her mother's intuition. Be patient with her worries. Try to notice the sweetness of her being a first time mom before jumping to give advice. 

Who knows, maybe she could have something to teach you.