We're in the middle now!

Yeah, I've been really bad. I would like to make more time for blogging. Its so fun to read back on things. I've realized how fast I forget things that have happened. 

Well life is good. We've been so so blessed. We have a pretty sweet garden (thanks to Caleb's master  gardener skills and his cute grandparents). He is seriously a dream boy. He works so hard in school and is getting all A's. He cooks when I need him to (and sometimes just because). He makes sure our garden is getting everything it needs to be a success. He even sews my clothes that rip! ha ha. I know you're thinking, "So Paige, what do you do!?" ha ha. We're sort of in an awkward time right now. Caleb is no longer working at SDL so I'm working full time and enjoying a short break from school while Caleb is going to school and trying to find a job. He is going into physical therapy for any of you who didn't know. His original plan was engineering, but that changed last year. He never really loved it and seemed to feel that he found his niche when  he discovered his interest in medical stuff. I just want him to LOVE his job and be excited about it. He never was that way about engineering.

Lately the theme to my life has shifted a little. I feel so blessed for everything that I have, but there is so much that I want and look forward to. All the sudden when I got married people say to me when I am adoring a child, "you're baby hungry huh?" Um... Yes, but not because I'm married. I've been this crazy about kids since I was one! ha ha. I know I need to slow down and enjoy this journey, but I'm so excited to be a mom!  Caleb and I read a talk the other night,  Always in the middle by President Uchtdorf. Here is the link if you'd like to go read it:   https://www.lds.org/liahona/2012/07/always-in-the-middle?lang=eng&query=middle

As we read it I realized something. I always pictured marriage as the middle of marriage; not the newly wed stage and not the empty-nesters. I pictured marriage as the part when Caleb works hard at a job he loves while I'm home with our adorable children. I pictured Caleb coming home at night with children happy and clean, dinner hot and ready, and home decorated and spotless. I pictured a lovely family meal together, scripture reading time, play time, then putting the children to bed together. This was my happily ever after. Heavenly Father knows I have much to learn.

First of all, the bearing and raising children stage is usually less than half of our lives. I am learning to be happy in every stage of my life. Secondly, even when I am in that ideal stage of being in the middle of marriage - things will NOT be perfect (and may I add nor were they intended to be!) 

This talk was so good because I need to see myself always in the middle. I'm not too inexperienced at marriage to know how to strengthen it. Caleb and I can be setting family traditions with or without children. I can be the best mom now. I don't have to have children in my home to be a mom. Also, I can be the best wife now.Thank goodness for the gospel! 

On another note: I never pictured myself actually going and finishing college. I just have kept at it and listened to the Holy Ghost for guidance. Right now I am set to graduate from Weber State next year and my plan is to go to PA school after that ( which is two years). Caleb and I both feel it is important for me to finish my education. I know many women inside and out of my family who had to work 40+ hours a week to provide for their children. If anything every happened to Caleb, I need to be prepared. I think its much harder for children to have to raise each other because mom is working to put food on the table than for a women to just finish her education so that she's not begging for low paying jobs. I watched my  mom quit school when I was young so she could finish raising us. When she was left a single mom less than 10 years later she had to work hard physical labor to provide. She is a good women and I'm so grateful for her sacrifice. Too many women are left in this situation and too often the children suffer the most.

 I know that as we trust Heavenly Father, things will work out.